An Urgent Message . . . From Borg Biden
Today's senseless conspiracy blog rant has been interrupted by an urgent message from our guest speaker, Biden the Borg . . .
"My fellow Amerikins, look deep into my dark, borg-implanted eyes and repeat after me, repeat after me . . . I am weak, helpless, lost, confused and afraid. I need benevolent puppet master Sleepy Joe and Big Government and their generous stimulus package, an obvious sampling of the universal basic income we are desperate to implant after crashing the U.S. economy and completing the long-planned decimation of the American middle class, which we have finally accomplished across the globe, from the secret pyramids of Antarctica to the lost ancient cities of Antarctica. . . .
"I am weak and helpless and afraid and I need good old CNN and the NY Times and Entertainment Tonight and those brilliant Zuckerborg masterminds running Amazon, Google, Twister, U2 (great band by the way, love that billionaire minion Bono) and Flashbook and the whole mother-loving mind-controlling Beast System to get woke. And more importantly, to tell me what's real and what's not, what I need to buy (which is everything, why the hell not?) and what's real and what's not and what's true and what you plain just don't need to know, sheeple.
"You are weak and afraid and simple-minded and mired in a fake confabulated history you will never be able to unwind (goaddamned Conspiracy theorists) whether you know it or not, you all despritly need kindly old Uncle Joe and the DCD, The Who (great band by the way), and probably the CIA too (though I aint allowed into those meetings for some reason) and our all-important Homeland Security (great show by the way) and the United Nations and that precious and completely safe wonderful new vacillation to protect me and my weak, sickly, defenseless family of miseducated TV babies and soc med zombies from that big bad Coronka virus we, I mean those damned Chinese concocted to aid the Deep State elite in implementing a wonderful New World Order, New World Order, New World Order . . .
"Now where was I? My fellow Amerikins, this has been another urgent fear speech brought to you by kind and always politically culturally and otherwise geopolitcally correct Uncle Borg and the New World Order, the New World Order . . . . Not Bjorn Borg, by the way, Jesus that French guy was one hell of a golfer back in the day.
Don't give up on hopelessness and God bless Amerika . . .
Ni Hao Kai Lan . . ."
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